I can feel summer.
But I don't feel the same anymore.
It's summer, but not the same anymore.
Sitting on the left side of the bed, close to the window.
So that I can stare at the dark starless sky through the curtains.
I can see the moon, I could see it in the evening too,
when the sun was about to sleep.
Did I feel the same looking at it?
Or I just thought I felt good?
No, I didn't want to look at the moon earlier
Just wanted to capture the orange ombre sky in my mind
As if the sun didn't sleep every evening.
As if summers like these don't come every year.
It was the would've beens that I was counting
to make myself believe that there was something real left in me.
A situation that made me so naive that I literally took it as my whole life.
It was the could've beens that I didn't count
It made me feel something that was greater than regret
A situation made me feel so indecisive that I didn't want to live it.
And it was also the should've beens that scooped the beating heart out of my ribcage
As if I was the reason it didn't happen like it should have.
A situation that made me want to rewind it again and again until it was done right.
You must be thinking why are these two completely different pieces sewed together, right? Well it's because I somehow managed to feel different emotions at the same time. One thing that I love here is that these pieces are so similar yet so different. I think I should not give more description and just let you guys interpret my scattered emotions.
